OK, so after a day at TJ's disassembling the car I determined that it wasn't the ball joints, and had to take it in to the shop where they told me it was the wheel bearings. And it was expensive. Thankfully we had enough to scrape together to pay for the fix and we have great family that helped out too.

I'm registering for classes tonight, Latin II, Belief Morality and the Modern Mind, and either Independent readings in Classical Greek, Medieval Philosophy, or History of Post-Reformation Christianity.

Yet more tests tomorrow, seems like we've got one every week.
Thanksgiving's fast approaching! It's my favorite "Get together" holiday. It's got a good premise, low commercialism, and it's to the point: friends, family, food, fun. No mandatory present buying, no mandatory decoration, no covetous insanity pulling at the national heartstrings. Thank God for Thanksgiving. We're planning on going down to my granny's/aunt's place in Centralia to celebrate, they're out in the quasi-boonies, far out enough for woodsmoke to be a common smell. Centralia also had a 3.9 earthquake today.

You know, I'm sure there are all sorts of interesting things to post, but very little's coming to mind right now....let's see.... we've started a home group, so far it's just TJ & Destiny coming, though I've invited some more ppl who've expressed interest. We still don't really have anything in the way of worship. Trying to make my way through Siegbert Becker's "The Foolishness of God" on the relationship of reason to faith in Jesus Christ in Martin Luther's writing.

Oh, yes, there is some massively large news (that at the moment is very small) but I'm not at liberty to divulge it yet.

Encouragements and Exhortations

Due to the kindness of a friend from church who watched our herd of hobbits, Brandy and I were able to go out for an early Anniversary present almost a week ago now. We made it up to Seattle and enjoyed fish and chips up by the Ballard locks and walked through the garden near there. Then we went to a Tully's nearby and sat down to talk. It was especially good to have time to talk about our plans and hopes and thoughts. Before that day I really hadn't tried to organize them enough to present them in any sort of order, and here are a few.

I've had a sort of "drifting" feeling within the past months, of aimlessness - like I'm just existing. I've had doubts about the Lord's plans for us out here - maybe doubts isn't the right word, more like lack of interest. I've treated everything as it comes with indifference, like going to school, or my job, as a separate instance of life, not as a part of a greater unified plan.

Normally I hate planning, because it seems like things so rarely go to plan, and I don't like setting myself up for disappointment. But as I thought about it, I could definitely see the working hand of God in all that's happened with us over the past year. I am coming to believe that it's through my timidity in recognizing it AS the work of my Lord Jesus and the lax way I've talked about our circumstances and plans that have killed the zeal I should be burning with. "And without faith it is impossible to please Him". I had been asking God for specific things for the past three years:
#1. to send us somewhere, then receiving the word to Washington,
#2. I asked for a job, and believed I was being led specifically to the Job at SPU Security, and God not only brought us out here safely, but gave us a place to live, and out of many candidates gave me my current Job. When back in MN I looked at this job, I prayed about going back to school and in part applied with hope of getting tuition discounts.
#3. When I applied to go to SPU, I asked the Lord to give me a sign financially if I was to Go to school with his blessing. I got a full ride with grants and scholarships (didn't have to take out any loans) The amount I've been given to pay for school this year is almost exactly what it will take for a year @ SPU (almost 30K). If my Father hasn't done this, then who has? I could never have afforded this on my own. If it wasn't for my conviction that the Lord was taking us out here, I never would have thought to apply for the job @ SPU security, since they asked for someone with a B.A. in the listing, whereas I don't even have an A.A. .

God has given us a good church to go to here, with a pastor who is genuinely interested in us for the Lord's sake, and who takes the time to go through the "Men in Turn" leadership training with me and to keep me in the word and serving while waiting for God to move us up to the Seattle area. It's not many pastors who would be willing to give that time to someone they knew was only going to be in their congregation for a year. He also shelled out a chunk of cash to give me the resources for that program gratis, including the "Foundations for Pentecostal Theology" book and the Chuck Smith "Through the Bible" series. Because of his working with me I've memorized the first two chapters of Titus (which sadly enough is the first time I've ever memorized two consecutive chapters of scripture) and am now working on the 3rd. May God repay him for all he's done for my good!

Also, a couple nights ago I was kicking students out of OMH at about 2:30AM (it's the physics and mathematics building, so the students would stay there all night to do homework if they were allowed to). I started talking to one of the guys, and as we began talking he asked about my work, and I told him why I went to work here in part-to study classics to learn Greek and Latin and learn the background of scripture better. Then I pointed out that it didn't have any occupational value but was only for my own enjoyment (which is a lie, since I want to do it to Serve my God and His people, but I've said that so many times in an apologetic way as if I was ashamed for going to school for something not technical or "practical" to make money that I'd almost come to believe it) But this blessed kid says "Well, that sounds like it will open up lots of opportunities to minister and serve God" and I again pointed out that I meant unlike physics, which he studies, my degree will have next to no money value, and he replied, "Well, that's why I study physics, so I can support people like you!"

I shut my mouth, and for a second almost felt like crying. I'd convinced myself almost that no one values what I want in my heart and felt the call to - to teach and feed the Word of God to men, and to go to school to supplement this. And here this kid in one sentence made me ashamed of my shame and encouraged me to no end, to think that there are people who so value the word of God and the office of Overseer that they would work to support it! God forgive me. But what that kid said stuck with me, and I have felt its encouragement 'til now.

God help me to encourage others too, I've been reminded how much it's needed!

So I told all this to Brandy, and she told me she's been in the same funk of not feeling like we're doing anything, and like I was going to school just to go to school, and a feeling of unreality regarding us starting a church.

And the more I've been thinking about it, I know I've got to recover a passionate love for God, and a pursuit of Him, and an "Abiding in Him". That's where all these desires came from in the first place, and I can't recover passions created by the lifeblood of Jesus Christ without being plugged firmly into his Vine, and drinking in His life. All these dreams are just that without him, and will be impossible to pursue without Him in me to give me works, to will and to work his pleasure-with pleasure.

Interesting Dei.

On the way to work, I "talked" with a deaf guy who struck up a non-verbal conversation with me at the downtown bus stop in which I got to share my faith with him, then at work, I met Jen the student worker who watched old Battlestar Galactica episodes on her computer the entire day at dispatch while training me in (she also gave me a donut and a handful of pringles! Nice!). Ray,( who reminds me of Robert (Berto) Perez back in MN), came into the office sporting a ghetto fabulous wardrobe and commented on my shirt's new-looking-ness. Joe noticed Ray had gotten a haircut, upon which observation Ray removed his hat for a haircut inspection by us. I said it looked shorter, Ray followed up with a smile and the comment: "I hate white people". I educated him as to my heritage, and we got into a conversation about the jews, and my theory that a majority of the world's population has some sort of Jewish heritage somewhere (since they've been scattered through the whole world for the past 3000 years) then Ray & I got into a conversation about the books of Judges and 1 Samuel, which he'd just finished and I'm still reading through. We talked about our favorite judges and the messed up ending with the Levite who was a class-A hole to his concubine (Ray & I agreed) and the horrible benjamite nastiness which brought it out, the conflict between Benjamin & everybody else plus the ensuing slaughter on both sides and shenanigans in general by the rest of too compassionate (in my opinion) Israel to make sure the nasty tribe of benjamin continued to crawl the earth...bleah. I want to slap that Levite around every time I read that story. The Benjamites and him are what flamethrowers were created for.
Oh, and I ordered two pairs of tactical boots for work. Really cool ones. And processed quite a few applications for the Flexpasses that SPU gives out to FT employees (Think "Multipass", like in 5th element. I do.-that's one of my favorite parts of that movie, when He's trying to get them to believe that Lilu's his wife while she keeps holding up the card and repeating "Multi-pass!" with a beaming smile.)

Anyhoo... On the bus ride home I missed my first bus, witnessed a partial beat-down from a half a block away, (which was broken up by the time I got there) Got a call from my little brother, got lost on the bus system, found my way back, had a gay shirtless heavily-pierced guy at the bus stop prance around in front of me trying to elicit attention which I all to gladly and nauseously withheld, was subject to the bus stopping while the bus driver gave a first and last warning to the people in the back of the bus to stop smoking their ganja, (oh my goodness, I almost got a contact high-and then they had the nerve to deny it with straight faces!) and finally at about 10pm I made it home. Reading "Out of the Silent Planet" (for like the fifth time so far) helped me stay awake. I also read most of J Gresham Machen's "The Christian Faith in the Modern World" (written in the '30s, but perfect for today as well. I've come to the conviction that there are very few really good books out there, and tons and tons of books that are basically attempts to re-write something that an author of a preceding generation wrote with much more skill and inspiration, and then put a snazzy new cover to it and market it like a panacea. Machen's books I'm beginning to think belong in the realm of classics, along with C.S. Lewis & Francis Schaeffer.)

I've just noticed that I use a LOT of parentheses.

And further, I found it's becoming frighteningly easy to put off reading the actual Scriptures of God in favor of reading a book about the scriptures of God. When these moments of realization hit I'm confronted with the absurdity of my choice (why bother reading something that's only meant to enhance that which I'm avoiding?!) So I caved in to the Holy Spirit's influence on my reason and read Matthew 5-7

I read Matt 7:13-15 over and over until it sank in. It's been too long since that one sank in. I've read it a gazillion times, but not often have I read it and stared at it until it comes into mental focus.